....and faith will work by love....

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( I don't expect any of my reading friends to make it through the entirety of this post. I am recording these thoughts so that I can remind myself of God's goodness to me, now, and in the moment of Him answering my requests. And in case you are wondering, I love that little blond boy............)

I've struggled during the last couple of weeks in trusting God concerning two very specific areas of my life: Graeme and moving. Obviously, it shouldn't surprise me that I am wrestling with child training issues--I have an almost 22 month old for crying out loud. ( And, by the way, I've heard a lot of crying out loud lately, wink wink! ) Tonight was one of those times where bedtime needed to come quickly. And then, a few minutes after Graeme went to bed I wanted to open his door, pick him up out of his crib, and just hold him. How does that work? I smiled to myself as I pondered entering his room to rock him for a while--love is such a beautiful gift of God's mercy. To quote a line from one of Graeme's books, "I love you any way you feel, no matter what you do. I love you any way you are. I love you because you're you!"

Life on the home-front has been extremely busy, yet slow at the same time, it's been joyful, yet agonizing, and it's been demanding yet extremely rewarding. And when I say rewarding, I don't mean that my child is obedient and perfect and what a joy it is to see my hard work pay off. ( Right now I'm actually thinking of the adjectives snotty and naughty, concerning mister Graemie-bear, but, I digress............... ) I say rewarding in the sense that God has consistently reminded me, through these difficulties, that my parenting efforts must be motivated by God's grace instead of self-trust and pride. I was reminded this afternoon by Graeme himself, as I picked him up to chat with him about why we can't run in the street, and he loudly yelled, "Jesus!". And although I would like to think he was asking Jesus to help him in that moment, well, it was just a timely reminder for my heart to cry out for Jesus................

And then there is the looming issue of moving. To trust that God knows our needs. To wonder if he will allow us to move into a larger space or if he will simply make us content with where we are, because heaven knows that the space we are in is ample room for us, it's just all of our junk that gets in the way-- or my Cranny crap as Steve jokingly calls the massive amount of crafty-stuff that calls our house home( but remember, I don't scrapbook or do crafts, wink wink ). Because I've learned that prayer is to be a conversation where my life and my God meet, I've been doing a lot of praying concerning our new home--because that's my life--my home is my life at this stage. I want my home to be an extension of what God is doing in my heart.

Our Sunday study through the book of Genesis has been quite appropriate for the issues that God is kneading into my life, and I look forward to seeing Him work more and more................

9 comments:

  1. thanks for sharing....I'll be praying for you more specifically~


    Tricia

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  2. Sarah, thank you for your words this morning -- a timely reminder for myself! I have found myself in a *rough* phase with my own 17 month old boy (with some lovely 2 & 3 yr old girly attitudes and issues thrown in). My responses to their behavior definitely speak volumes on the status of my heart and my trusting God in all things! Our kids are SO worth it, but it is hard and it is frustrating at times -- it's been so good to show me my own need for Jesus and His grace!

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  3. My heart echos so many of your thoughts, though yours are beautifully put. In the midst of struggles, I am suddenly a child begging for mercy from my heavenly Father. What a beautiful relationship we can display to our children! I always have to heave a big sigh as I sneak into our girls' room after those difficult days... see their middle-of-the-night dreamy faces and wonder if it was my imagination?? :)

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  4. I'm not usually one to be too open about myself online, but I will be first to admit that I am not a religious person. Not in the fact that I don't believe in a higher power but I struggle with the concept of religion vs science. But after reading your post I see how faith can help a person manage their life, because life can be taxing. I try to keep a positive outlook on life, I've even been called overly optimistic and questioned as to how I can be so happy when my world is crumbling around me. So after reading every consonant and vowel of your post, I would like to thank you for being so sincere and opening your heart for those to smile upon it. I will send good vibes your way and hope that life gets better... there is always a rhyme and reason for everything and when it all comes together it will be a beautiful song. :)

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  5. Super lovely blog!


    xoxo,

    colormenana.blogspot.com

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  6. oh Sarah, how beautifully written! Yes, this is the most amazing part of parenting/mothering. God is so kind to steward us with such wonderful gifts that draw our hearts even closer to Him and our intense need of Him every moment of every day.
    May you continue to experience such intense need...and such lavish Grace!
    And on the topic of the move...continue steadfastly to commune with God. My heart is set in the same pattern of distrust...and I find myself so encouraged as I confess and commune with God in the midst of my busy blessed days!

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  7. "Because I've learned that prayer is to be a conversation where my life and my God meet, I've been doing a lot of praying concerning our new home--because that's my life--my home is my life at this stage. I want my home to be an extension of what God is doing in my heart."

    Love this.

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  8. Thank you for sharing this. It was an encouragement to my heart.

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  9. I have never been more aware of my need for sanctification until having a 2 yr. old little boy. =)
    I desperately pray that God will bless you with more space. I know how very difficult it is when the walls seem to close in from all sides!

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Thank you so much for reading here and sharing life with me!